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10 Courtroom Manipulation Tactics Used by High-Conflict Personalities

High-conflict personalities don't abandon their manipulation tactics when they enter the courthouse—they refine them. Recognizing these patterns protects your clients and children.

Tactic 1: Impression Management

Presenting an carefully crafted public persona that contradicts private behavior. They appear calm, cooperative, and reasonable in evaluations while engaging in controlling, abusive behavior at home.

Tactic 2: DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender)

When confronted with their abuse, they deny it happened, attack the credibility of the person making accusations, and claim they are actually the victim. This reversal confuses evaluators and judges.

Tactic 3: Projection

Accusing the other parent of behaviors they themselves engage in. The controlling parent claims the victim is controlling. The alienating parent accuses the victim of alienation.

Tactic 4: Playing the Victim

Positioning themselves as the aggrieved party, unfairly attacked by a vindictive ex. They may cry in court, express hurt and confusion, and claim they "just want what's best for the children."

Tactic 5: Gaslighting Through Documentation

Creating extensive written records (emails, texts, journals) that distort reality, making reasonable boundaries look unreasonable and normal reactions appear extreme.

Tactic 6: Selective Truth-Telling

Telling technically true statements while omitting critical context that would reveal the full truth. They provide partial facts that support their narrative while hiding contradictory evidence.

Tactic 7: Manufactured Urgency

Creating crises and emergencies that paint them as the protective parent responding to danger, when in reality they're manufacturing situations to gain advantage.

Tactic 8: Charm Offensive

Deploying superficial charm to win over evaluators, guardians ad litem, and judges. They may bring gifts, volunteer information, and appear cooperative while the victim appears defensive.

Tactic 9: Strategic Use of Therapy and Evaluations

Weaponizing therapeutic recommendations and evaluation results to support their narrative, often by misrepresenting what therapists actually said or by shopping for sympathetic professionals.

Tactic 10: Undermining Parent-Child Relationship

Subtly sabotaging the other parent through "empowerment" (telling child they don't have to visit if they don't want to), schedule disruptions, and emotional manipulation of the child.